ADHD Couples Therapy

ADHD doesn't exist in isolation. It affects every aspect of a couple's relational system. In couples therapy, focusing only on individual behavior often misses the larger patterns that maintain conflict and frustration. That's where systems-based work becomes essential. By looking at the relationship as a system, therapy shifts from "fixing one partner" to changing patterns in the interactions themselves, creating lasting relational change. Here are some common areas to intervene when I'm working with ADHD couples.

Identify Recurring Cycles

Recognize patterns such as pursue-withdraw, blame-shame loops, or over-functioning vs. under-functioning dynamics.

Redefine Partner Roles

Create clarity around responsibilities, expectations, and boundaries for both partners.

Communication & Empathy

Help both partners understand how ADHD-related patterns shape behavior and emotional responses, including rejection sensitivity or issues of trust and neglect.

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Emotional Intensity & Regulation

Understand why conflict escalates so quickly or feels inescapable. Develop specific interventions tailored to each partner's neurobiology and needs.