My Model

How We Work: The Relational Architecture

 

Most couples come to therapy because they feel stuck in a loop of "uncaring" behavior or chronic misunderstanding. My approach moves beyond "better communication." I combine Family Systems Theory, Relational Life Therapy (RLT), Imago Dialogue, and Neurobiology to help you move from a state of reactive survival to conscious connection.

 

Our work follows a structured, three-layered process:

 

1. The Neuro-Biological Foundation (Regulation)
We begin by "looking under the hood" of your conflict. Using a Polyvagal and ADHD-informed lens, we identify where lagging skills, not a lack of love, are driving the disconnect. We translate "character flaws" into nervous system states, helping you move from "fight-or-flight" into a regulated place where change is actually possible.

 

2. The Systemic Map (Accountability)
Drawing from Family Systems and RLT, we identify the "Adaptive Child" patterns you brought into the relationship to protect yourselves. We look at the "Legacy" of how you were raised to understand your current dance. Here, we practice Radical Accountability, helping each partner step out of the "Who’s Right?" power struggle and into their Functional Adult self.

 

3. The Healing Connection (Intimacy)
Once the "system" is stable and the "biology" is understood, we use Imago Dialogue to repair past injuries. This is where we move from "fixing" to "feeling." We create a space where you can finally hear each other’s deepest needs and build a Conscious Relationship. One that honors both your shared goals and your individual neuro-biological makeup.